The greatest measure of a person’s life is found in love.
Warren Buffet, some 18 years ago, defined it further as whether or not the people you want to have love you, love you.
I used to believe that. Until I realized that approach can be gamed. You can pursue only the reciprocal. You can choose to stop loving those who don’t love you back. I don’t buy Warren Buffett’s advice.
It’s selfish. It sets us on a path where we are judged by the way people see us. That’s great for history books. It’s not a great way to move forward in life. It’s downright unhealthy.
I believe he’s onto something; he just got caught up on the validation. On outcomes. Outcomes aren’t always ours to take credit or blame for. What is ours is our effort, our motivation, our approach. Give me the right work over lucky outcomes any day. Really.
Which is why I see it differently. At 44. With two kids. Who I struggle with on a moment to moment basis between who I want them to become and what I need them to know: which is that I love them, no matter what.
And the latter point is where it clicks.
To me, that’s the greatest measure of success today. Loving. No matter what.
I wonder then: Have I found a way to love everyone I meet? For some reason? Have I found a way to love more no matter what you get back?
You don’t love so you can be loved. You love simply to love. Love isn’t something you can channel, or direct, or choose.
Love Just is.
The greatest measure of a person’s life is how much, how far, how wide — how truly and honestly, you love.
In year 44, I vow to love more, regardless. I vow to just love. And I believe if I can do so, it will be my most successful year ever. And if I can’t. I’ll be back here writing the same thing for year 45.